Lots of people don't like to use public restrooms, and if they do use them, even if the bathroom is very clean and offers seat covers, they refuse to sit on the seat. This in turn causes the person for whatever reason to pee all over the seat. I would expect this from men, (no offense) but for women its absolutely deplorable. I am not one of those people who won't sit on the seat of a public restroom. I have never caught anything from it, and the worse feeling you can have is sitting on a seat and getting someone else's urine on you. Or you have to clean off someone else's urine off the seat in order to use the bathroom. This is a plea to everyone, to be respectful and clean when you use a restroom. Would you pee all over your toilet seat at home and not wipe it off?? Then why do it in public. Don't use the excuse they don't know, because they damn well know. I make exceptions for people who are elderly and have incontinence so they are always wet and don't necessarily look to see if they left anything behind. I know I've walked into a bathroom behind my grandmother many times and had to clean up after her. I make it a habit to have to "use" the restroom when she is done. I then clean up her mess so the next person doesn't have to see it or deal with it. But for people of age who are completely capable, have no excuse other than being nasty and having no regard for the next person who may have to use that restroom, I have nothing but contempt for you.
If you have to stand and pee because you don't want to sit, even with the seat cover available for your use, and you make a mess, CLEAN IT UP! I don't want to have to do it and I'm sure the next person behind you doesn't want to have to touch some strangers urine and disinfect it so they can use the potty. If you can't use a public restroom without being nasty about it, than wait until you go home and pee all over the seat there. I'm tired of walking into a bathroom and there is a urine all over the seat. Sad thing is, it's becoming more and more common here at school. Just because we have janitorial service doesn't make them your personal cleaner upper. Grow up and be responsible and stop being nasty. I hope this goes public and people will become aware of their actions, but my intuition tells me they already know and don't care about the next person. It's people like this cause others to start doing it. Personally I'm going to clean it up, not add to it. Sit down, I promise it won't kill you. Just check the seat first.
Friday, March 14, 2014
Part 2
Last night, Ky was called to his mom's house at 1130 at night to go deal with her. She said she had problems breathing and the sisters didn't want to deal with it. So off he goes, missing another day of work which we can't afford, because these worthless girls are just that, worthless. She really does need to see a neurologist, I think she does have something wrong, she keeps having muscle spasms on one side of her body and this is not something you can fake. If you can I want to see it. I think it might have a lot to do with everything she says she is feeling. For now though, she is going to go to her "home town" of New Orleans and stay with her sister for a month. Flying makes her nervous and I'm sure the build up the actual flight is effecting her. Ky is going to fly with her to N.O, stay the night and come home Sunday evening. The oldest sister, who also has power of attorney, has stated now that she is tired of all the drama and she's moving out (we'll see). If that is the case however, and she follows through, Ky says he will have to move in there with her. Now this is a problem on many fronts. I like my house, even if it's technically not mine, since I rent. I own a pit bull and a Chihuahua. She doesn't want animals in her home. I can respect that. But I will not give up my "children" to go live there with him and her. I also would not be comfortable staying there as it's not my home, her English isn't very strong, so communication is limited, and I don't want to live so far from MY mom and grandmother. Nothing will be decided until I finish school, but I already know I won't be going with him. Does this mean the end of my relationship? I hope not. Hopefully something can be worked out, but I can't under any circumstances see me living in the same house as his mother and it's not because I would feel obligated to help take care of her because I'm there. I would help just because it's what to do. Now I'm lost and confused and don't know what to do.
This blog is for class, but I just might keep it going even if no one reads it. It's a good way to vent, if nothing else.
This blog is for class, but I just might keep it going even if no one reads it. It's a good way to vent, if nothing else.
Parents and Grandparents
Some of us are old enough to have aging parents and if lucky still have a grandparent(s) around. Sometimes it falls to us the children and grandchildren to take care of them. Sometimes it falls to us to have to take care of them, even if it means living with them. If you already live with them, and you don't pay anything to live there and your sole responsibility is to take care of your parent, why is it such a problem? If they say they don't feel well, or want to go to the hospital, you should do it. If there are two children living in the house, the same applies. Why do we complain about taking care of them if that's what we are there for? Why is the first thing that comes to mind is sticking them away somewhere? I've written a lot about my grandma, but I don't think I ever complain or moaned about all the doctor visits I have to take her to, driving her out to her home to pick up her mail, as she temporally(?) staying with my mom. Yes, I've put her in her place when I couldn't take HER complaining about certain things, but never about her health. Do I think she might have a touch of hypochondria? Yeah. If someone is sick, she seems to always come down with something. Funny even her doctor pointed it out to her on her last visit to her PCP. BUT, it's her body, her money and if she needs to go to the doctor 5 times a day then so be it. I don't live with her, but I'm her taxi and the closest person who actually understands what is going on. I have to constantly explain to her what her doctor is telling her. It frustrates her when they talk to me, but there is a reason for that. She doesn't listen very well, she's half deaf, and she takes away what she wants to hear and not the rest. This is where I have to intervene and explain things to her. This doesn't frustrate me. The complaining about her dirty house and her son who is taking care of things while she is gone. I think I wrote about having it out with her a few weeks ago or maybe even earlier than that. It seems to have made a slight impact. We went to her house on Monday after her doctor appointment, and she wanted to go inside. I had already set the rule that if I take her there, she either stays in the car while I grab what she wants, or if she goes inside no complaining about anything. I reminded her of this when she started to get out of the car and she told me she remembered and she would do her best. Low and behold, not one complaint about her house. Didn't even get down in the mouth and gave a compliment to her son about weeding out her flower garden. He of course can't take a compliment that is given, he has to complain it wasn't a good enough compliment. He is such another story I'm not going further than that. My point is, I think I got through to her, at least a little bit.
But this isn't about my grandma per se, it was just an example. Now the other "example" I gave about the two daughters are the complete opposite. They live with their mom, who is retired at 60, (long story) and it primarily the oldest sister who should be taking care of her mom, but no reason the little sister can't help. It's pathetic that they live in the same house, but if mom needs anything she has to call her daughter on the phone, who is in the house, to come help her. They see her as an inconvenience and they blame her for their father's suicide. No one put that gun in his hand, he's the one who did it all. Regardless of if they were having marriage problems, you don't kill yourself because of it. So the anger is misplaced, they should be angry with their father, which is far healthier than being angry with your mother and blaming her. They don't take into account that she lost her husband and mate for the last 35 years. She can't talk to them because they don't want to listen. They are there for the money and easy ride. God forbid they should actually have to do something to help her. They call her a hypochondriac and they are tired of it. Hypochondriac usually are that way for a reason. The don't get any attention otherwise and so the only way they know to get attention is to feel ill. Maybe start spending time out, away from the house would help. Take her on outings, and try to get her involved with people she can feel comfortable with. This woman still has not received any comfort from her children about the loss of her husband. They just place blame. And they want the money. If she is gone, committed or otherwise, they have the money. This seems to me like their plan from the get go. I was at the hospital the night her husband did what he did. 4 of his six siblings were already debating on how long it would take to put "mama" in the nuthouse. The man was still alive, and none of them sat with her while we were waiting for the news if he would make it or not as he didn't complete the job. Her son and the one daughter who lives her on her own with hew two kids are the ones who sat with her, and mainly her son. He held her when she cried. The others didn't even want to be in the same room.
Despite the circumstances, be kind to your parents and your grandparents. They raised you, sheltered you and loved you. Why in their time of need can't we at least do the same for them?
But this isn't about my grandma per se, it was just an example. Now the other "example" I gave about the two daughters are the complete opposite. They live with their mom, who is retired at 60, (long story) and it primarily the oldest sister who should be taking care of her mom, but no reason the little sister can't help. It's pathetic that they live in the same house, but if mom needs anything she has to call her daughter on the phone, who is in the house, to come help her. They see her as an inconvenience and they blame her for their father's suicide. No one put that gun in his hand, he's the one who did it all. Regardless of if they were having marriage problems, you don't kill yourself because of it. So the anger is misplaced, they should be angry with their father, which is far healthier than being angry with your mother and blaming her. They don't take into account that she lost her husband and mate for the last 35 years. She can't talk to them because they don't want to listen. They are there for the money and easy ride. God forbid they should actually have to do something to help her. They call her a hypochondriac and they are tired of it. Hypochondriac usually are that way for a reason. The don't get any attention otherwise and so the only way they know to get attention is to feel ill. Maybe start spending time out, away from the house would help. Take her on outings, and try to get her involved with people she can feel comfortable with. This woman still has not received any comfort from her children about the loss of her husband. They just place blame. And they want the money. If she is gone, committed or otherwise, they have the money. This seems to me like their plan from the get go. I was at the hospital the night her husband did what he did. 4 of his six siblings were already debating on how long it would take to put "mama" in the nuthouse. The man was still alive, and none of them sat with her while we were waiting for the news if he would make it or not as he didn't complete the job. Her son and the one daughter who lives her on her own with hew two kids are the ones who sat with her, and mainly her son. He held her when she cried. The others didn't even want to be in the same room.
Despite the circumstances, be kind to your parents and your grandparents. They raised you, sheltered you and loved you. Why in their time of need can't we at least do the same for them?
Friday, March 7, 2014
Obamacar or the so call Affordable Care Act and Florida
So I did my taxes yesterday after school. I don't have a job, but I still file anyway. Plus if you are in school you get a tax credit. So I would be stupid to miss out on the tax credit. After I finished my taxes, I was asked if I wanted to sign up at the Marketplace. Deadline is March 31 so I hit the button to go to the market place. After answering a few questions including my income which I put down as $0 because I don't have an income at this time and haven't for over two years. I am dependent on boyfriend and mom right now. Once out of school all this will change but until then I'm unemployed.
Can you believe I was told that I was NOT eligible for Medicaid, and I had to look for insurance on the Marketplace website??? The lowest quote from them was $350 and that was for really bad coverage. Paid only 60 percent, high ded. and high co-pays. I ask this question: How does someone who has 0 income pay for this insurance. I was not referred to any given tax breaks or help with paying. So I will NOT be insured by the deadline. Penalties are going to be one percent of your income on your taxes next year or $95 a month. I printed all this out, because I just couldn't believe it.
Good news? Floridians will not be penalized for not having insurance because our lovely Governor did not extend Medicaid. Due to this non extension, those who should have been able to get Medicaid under the new law, can't. Why would our Governor not extend Medicaid?? Because he wants to save money so he can say what goo he has done. Why did a FEDERAL law go into the hands of each individual state? This makes no sense. Why is their no uniformity and rules that all states have to abide by? This Affordable Care Act was SUPPOSED to make sure no one went uninsured. Just by my experience I can tell that in Florida, their are still going to be a lot of uninsured people. Hope the Governor has put money aside to pay the hospitals when some of these people get ill and have no choice but to go to a hospital because they can't afford a doctor's visit and any tests that may be needed. The question that has been unanswered since I became unemployed and could not get Medicaid is: Why? I obviously don't make enough money. They can check my bank and see my low balance. My boyfriend is not responsible for paying my health insurance, he is not my husband and really is not responsible for me. He could kick me out today and I would have to leave, because he pays the bills. He would have no power or water cause that is in my name so I would shut it off, but other than that I have no say so. He pays everything, even if it's in my name. So how am I supposed to get insurance???
Can you believe I was told that I was NOT eligible for Medicaid, and I had to look for insurance on the Marketplace website??? The lowest quote from them was $350 and that was for really bad coverage. Paid only 60 percent, high ded. and high co-pays. I ask this question: How does someone who has 0 income pay for this insurance. I was not referred to any given tax breaks or help with paying. So I will NOT be insured by the deadline. Penalties are going to be one percent of your income on your taxes next year or $95 a month. I printed all this out, because I just couldn't believe it.
Good news? Floridians will not be penalized for not having insurance because our lovely Governor did not extend Medicaid. Due to this non extension, those who should have been able to get Medicaid under the new law, can't. Why would our Governor not extend Medicaid?? Because he wants to save money so he can say what goo he has done. Why did a FEDERAL law go into the hands of each individual state? This makes no sense. Why is their no uniformity and rules that all states have to abide by? This Affordable Care Act was SUPPOSED to make sure no one went uninsured. Just by my experience I can tell that in Florida, their are still going to be a lot of uninsured people. Hope the Governor has put money aside to pay the hospitals when some of these people get ill and have no choice but to go to a hospital because they can't afford a doctor's visit and any tests that may be needed. The question that has been unanswered since I became unemployed and could not get Medicaid is: Why? I obviously don't make enough money. They can check my bank and see my low balance. My boyfriend is not responsible for paying my health insurance, he is not my husband and really is not responsible for me. He could kick me out today and I would have to leave, because he pays the bills. He would have no power or water cause that is in my name so I would shut it off, but other than that I have no say so. He pays everything, even if it's in my name. So how am I supposed to get insurance???
Friday, February 28, 2014
Missing School
I've come to class everyday this week and been sent home because I'm sick. Most of my teachers know that I don't miss school and always attend class. My biggest surprise was when a certain teacher took notice and told me to go home. But she kept me an extra hour so I could get a copy of the review for the midterm. Not sure why she couldn't have just run off one copy and given it to me while we went on our first break. Maybe she just didn't think about it. Today, I'm not even attempting to go, just so I can be sent home. Really, you don't want to catch what I have. I am getting better (I think) not sneezing my head off anymore or at least not as much. Almost went off the road the other day because I couldn't stop sneezing and I couldn't see through all the water coming out of my eyes. Luckily I was almost home and on a "empty" road at the time. When the last one hit, I had to put my foot on the brake and stopped while in the midst of a sneezing attack. I had no idea if I had stopped in the correct lane, I just knew if I didn't stop I would not make it. When I was apparently finished, I was on the other side of the road and almost in someone's yard. This is the power of sneezing. You have no control. We've all sneezed going down the road, just one sneeze won't effect you much unless you are tail gaiting someone, cause when you sneeze, the foot goes down on the pedal. So there is reason number one not to tailgate. You just never know when you are going to sneeze. "Sorry officer, I sneezed and accidently hit the car", is not something you would want to say, most likely because they wouldn't believe you. You'd wind up on the list of "top ten stupid things people say to officers to get out of a ticket" list. I shouldn't have been driving anyway, but I was hungry and my bf wasn't going to go cause he's tired, he worked all day. Didn't even offer, just told me to get him a number one. Gee, thanks for your concern. I'm not even going to get started on him.
Just heard from my mom and grandma is coughing something fierce, mom afraid if she don't see a doctor soon, she will get pneumonia. So this probably means I will be getting a phone call soon to take her to a doc appointment today. I cannot complain, as before this mother of a cold came on, I just had a bad cough. So I snuck a couple hits off her albuterol inhaler, ( I have no insurance and can't afford to go to a doctor get a script for one, not to mention the inhaler WITH insurance is fifty dollars.) I wish I could just walk up to a doctor, tell him what I need and have them write me a script. I've been through this before, I need my inhaler, amoxicillin, and a z-pack. I'll be better in a matter of a few days. Some would say this is fraud, but if you go through something so many times and you know all the signs, you should be able to do this. Now if you don't get better like you usually do, then you need to go in for an exam. This of course would never happen, but I can dream. Anyway, I feel bad that I used her inhaler and now she has a bad cough. I don't think my cough is contagious, pretty sure bronchitis and that's not catching. But I still feel bad. But I REALLY don't feel up to taking her to the doctor, but if the call comes, I'll have no choice.
I had no warning of this cold coming, I was "fine" on Sunday, and down for the count Monday. Usually I can feel a cold coming, feel kinda crappy the day before. Not this time. It smacked me down like a tornado in the night. Just didn't see it coming. I've been through 3 different kinds of cold meds and so far seems Alka Seltzer is the winner. Orders for me: lots of bed rest, fluids, food if hungry, and stay out of the cold. Hope everyone has a good weekend.
Just heard from my mom and grandma is coughing something fierce, mom afraid if she don't see a doctor soon, she will get pneumonia. So this probably means I will be getting a phone call soon to take her to a doc appointment today. I cannot complain, as before this mother of a cold came on, I just had a bad cough. So I snuck a couple hits off her albuterol inhaler, ( I have no insurance and can't afford to go to a doctor get a script for one, not to mention the inhaler WITH insurance is fifty dollars.) I wish I could just walk up to a doctor, tell him what I need and have them write me a script. I've been through this before, I need my inhaler, amoxicillin, and a z-pack. I'll be better in a matter of a few days. Some would say this is fraud, but if you go through something so many times and you know all the signs, you should be able to do this. Now if you don't get better like you usually do, then you need to go in for an exam. This of course would never happen, but I can dream. Anyway, I feel bad that I used her inhaler and now she has a bad cough. I don't think my cough is contagious, pretty sure bronchitis and that's not catching. But I still feel bad. But I REALLY don't feel up to taking her to the doctor, but if the call comes, I'll have no choice.
I had no warning of this cold coming, I was "fine" on Sunday, and down for the count Monday. Usually I can feel a cold coming, feel kinda crappy the day before. Not this time. It smacked me down like a tornado in the night. Just didn't see it coming. I've been through 3 different kinds of cold meds and so far seems Alka Seltzer is the winner. Orders for me: lots of bed rest, fluids, food if hungry, and stay out of the cold. Hope everyone has a good weekend.
Friday, February 21, 2014
Plans
Last week I posted what I would like to happen for Valentine's Day. None of this happened, however I did get the standard candy and flowers. Can I just say from my point of view that flowers are nice, candy I could do without, and it would have been nice if he'd spent a little money and maybe had them delivered to me at school or something special like that. I know the gesture was a last minute deal, but he at least made the effort. However, all I have ever asked for, is a card. One that expresses how he feels about me in writing. In ten years I have NEVER gotten a card from him. Is this a bad sign or does he just suck and doesn't want to bother with taking the time to find a card? Cards are less expensive and can mean more than flowers that are going to die and candy that really I don't need, and most of these assorted chocolates don't even have candy that I like. My grandmother bought a ten dollar box of chocolates for me, and I told her outright that I wished she hadn't bought it. I told her thank you, but for ten dollars, you could have a decent lunch. She already spends too much money as it is, I appreciate the gesture, but I really wished she hadn't got them. Still haven't opened them.
As for the night, that was out the window as soon as his mom called and asked him to take her to the hospital. She'd called him like 5 times during the day, while he was at work and CLOSER, instead she waits until he gets all the way home in DELTONA to ask him this. She lives in Meadow Woods, which is almost Kissimmee. I have no problem with him helping his mom when she calls, she's his mom. But why didn't she ask while he was closer? That was why she had called him so many times during the day, but for some reason couldn't ask him. Here is the kicker though. She has 2 daughters who live with her and they couldn't be bothered to take her to the hospital. They are tired of her always complaining and wanting to go to the hospital etc...The lady fell in her bathroom from blacking out the night before, hit her head on the marble counter top and then of course the floor. The next day she had a massive headache and thought something might be wrong. Anyway, he gets there and the youngest daughter is there with her boyfriend, and basically told him that they were tired of her many complaints and were mad at her so that's why they won't take her to the hospital. WTF! These "children" are full grown adults. They don't contribute to the bills, they don't do anything around the house and as far as I have been able to tell, they don't care about their mom or Ky (Key). When their father died, they were more concerned with the money they were going to get and how quickly they could put mom in a home. Ky of course didn't have any rights to anything because he wasn't his father. I had to keep him calm before he started fighting his family over his mom.
He was raised by his grandparents because his mom married a Chinese man (she and him are Vietnamese) and the grandparents knew that he wouldn't treat Ky the same or even well. He was a sick kid, had to have several heart surgeries, had a valve replaced and given a life span of maybe 20 yrs. (he's almost 40 now). His grandparents refused to let her take him. She was to absorbed in her new husband. When they died, he had to no choice but to move in with his mom. It didn't last long. The husband and Ky never got along so it didn't last. Any time he went over to visit her, the husband would always start an argument with him or say something snide and made sure he knew he wasn't wanted at the house.
Before he died they did come to terms and started treating each other better. But maybe that was because he knew he was going to blow his own head off. I don't know. Anyway, Ky drove all the way over there, took her to the hospital and stayed until they got her in a room around 4 a.m. Then he came home. That was my Valentine's Day. After many tests they determined she was ok and could go home. He was going to go pick her up, but one of the worthless sisters actually got off her butt and picked her up. Thank you God! We are poor. We cannot afford to pay all this gas going back and forth and his mom knows this, but felt she had no other choice. Going from Deltona to Kissimmee then to the hospital and then back home. That was over $20 in gas right there. But it was something he had to do and I don't begrudge him for it. I do however think his sisters and is brother are worthless and just hanging around waiting for mom to bite it. He has one sister who lives in St. Croix, and she is the ONLY one of his siblings to call him on his birthday, call just to check how he is doing, and calls on the holidays. She is the only one who's worth anything. She is the only one who actually cares about her brother and her mom. Too bad she's not here to help Ky fight the others, because he is seriously outnumbered. But if she had to, she would jump on a plane and be here as quick as she could. So that was my Valentine's Day. This is why, when you plan something, always expect the plan to fall through, just in case. That way you are not disappointed. Have a happy weekend!
As for the night, that was out the window as soon as his mom called and asked him to take her to the hospital. She'd called him like 5 times during the day, while he was at work and CLOSER, instead she waits until he gets all the way home in DELTONA to ask him this. She lives in Meadow Woods, which is almost Kissimmee. I have no problem with him helping his mom when she calls, she's his mom. But why didn't she ask while he was closer? That was why she had called him so many times during the day, but for some reason couldn't ask him. Here is the kicker though. She has 2 daughters who live with her and they couldn't be bothered to take her to the hospital. They are tired of her always complaining and wanting to go to the hospital etc...The lady fell in her bathroom from blacking out the night before, hit her head on the marble counter top and then of course the floor. The next day she had a massive headache and thought something might be wrong. Anyway, he gets there and the youngest daughter is there with her boyfriend, and basically told him that they were tired of her many complaints and were mad at her so that's why they won't take her to the hospital. WTF! These "children" are full grown adults. They don't contribute to the bills, they don't do anything around the house and as far as I have been able to tell, they don't care about their mom or Ky (Key). When their father died, they were more concerned with the money they were going to get and how quickly they could put mom in a home. Ky of course didn't have any rights to anything because he wasn't his father. I had to keep him calm before he started fighting his family over his mom.
He was raised by his grandparents because his mom married a Chinese man (she and him are Vietnamese) and the grandparents knew that he wouldn't treat Ky the same or even well. He was a sick kid, had to have several heart surgeries, had a valve replaced and given a life span of maybe 20 yrs. (he's almost 40 now). His grandparents refused to let her take him. She was to absorbed in her new husband. When they died, he had to no choice but to move in with his mom. It didn't last long. The husband and Ky never got along so it didn't last. Any time he went over to visit her, the husband would always start an argument with him or say something snide and made sure he knew he wasn't wanted at the house.
Before he died they did come to terms and started treating each other better. But maybe that was because he knew he was going to blow his own head off. I don't know. Anyway, Ky drove all the way over there, took her to the hospital and stayed until they got her in a room around 4 a.m. Then he came home. That was my Valentine's Day. After many tests they determined she was ok and could go home. He was going to go pick her up, but one of the worthless sisters actually got off her butt and picked her up. Thank you God! We are poor. We cannot afford to pay all this gas going back and forth and his mom knows this, but felt she had no other choice. Going from Deltona to Kissimmee then to the hospital and then back home. That was over $20 in gas right there. But it was something he had to do and I don't begrudge him for it. I do however think his sisters and is brother are worthless and just hanging around waiting for mom to bite it. He has one sister who lives in St. Croix, and she is the ONLY one of his siblings to call him on his birthday, call just to check how he is doing, and calls on the holidays. She is the only one who's worth anything. She is the only one who actually cares about her brother and her mom. Too bad she's not here to help Ky fight the others, because he is seriously outnumbered. But if she had to, she would jump on a plane and be here as quick as she could. So that was my Valentine's Day. This is why, when you plan something, always expect the plan to fall through, just in case. That way you are not disappointed. Have a happy weekend!
Friday, February 14, 2014
Happy Valentines Day everyone! Yeah, it's a greeting card holiday or so I've been told, and have said "bah humbug" in my past, (even when I was with someone). But thought today I would be upbeat and positive. Even if I and my bf don't go out, he may be too tired, he slings roofing tiles all day, and that's hard work, which he's not used to, so he's wore out by the time he gets home. So maybe we will do our usual nothing, or go out and put it off until tomorrow. Don't know yet. He mentioned dinner and a movie, which about a gazillion other people will be doing today. So not sure I want to go deal with the crowds. I'd rather spend that money on a new blu-ray player which we've never owned, and only sixty bucks at Wal-Mart. I had to prove to him that all Blu-ray players played DVDs too, because he thought they would only play Blu-ray discs. Really funny if you think about it, but I just had to look the answer up, 'cause I being woman am always wrong. Ha! Showed him the answer and shut him up. But anyway, maybe rather spend the money we would use to go out, and spend it on things we need (our dvd player stopped reading discs and it wasn't even ours anyway) and stay home and have something to show for our money instead of just a dinner we will forget and he's be too tired to enjoy. And there's a game out there that I want, so okay, maybe I want a little something for me. Nothing wrong with that.
Was sick last week, plus mom was sick, then of course grandma starts feeling ill, I swear I think she just wants attention, be it good or bad. Her doctor even said something about how she is always coming in with something. I tried not to laugh. But once my mom went to the hospital, she kinda got over it. It's too funny, once made aware she was in hospital and they were going to keep it, and I needed to come pick grandma up, (because she INSISTED on going) and then go grab some thing for her from home I had to drive to Sanford. I went to the hospital, thinking since grandma had been there all day long, she would be more than ready to go home. HA, stupid me! Soon as I go there, her attitude changed so quickly even my mom noticed it, while being hooked up, and quite frankly a little loopy from the pure oxygen they had her breathing. Mom out now, and seems to doing better, they gave her a clean bill of health for the most part, told her to go the PCP (who by the way she had just seen on Thursday and said she was fine and yet the ER said she was lucky she didn't have a heart attack), which is why they kept her. They said her heart unstable and oxygen very low ( duh, that is why she came in, she couldn't breathe). She will be changing here PCP. But she seems to be doing better and insisting that I take some of her medicine when I'm there, since I've been sick myself. I laughed and told her with everything going on, I didn't have the time to be sick, so it'll just have to go bother someone else. But mom always wins. What she wants me to do, I do, even if I think she needs it more and I don't want to take away from her. But she goes so far to basically put it my mouth so what am I supposed to do?
I hope everyone has a great day today single or coupled. Just go out and enjoy the sunshine while we got it and I hear it won't be so cold. The wind was a *itch yesterday. It was worse than just being cold. Weekend though and part of next week looks like it will be nice (yes, I watched the weather this morning). What ever anyone does, I hope they stay safe and watch out for those who celebrate too much and then drive. Have a great weekend!
Was sick last week, plus mom was sick, then of course grandma starts feeling ill, I swear I think she just wants attention, be it good or bad. Her doctor even said something about how she is always coming in with something. I tried not to laugh. But once my mom went to the hospital, she kinda got over it. It's too funny, once made aware she was in hospital and they were going to keep it, and I needed to come pick grandma up, (because she INSISTED on going) and then go grab some thing for her from home I had to drive to Sanford. I went to the hospital, thinking since grandma had been there all day long, she would be more than ready to go home. HA, stupid me! Soon as I go there, her attitude changed so quickly even my mom noticed it, while being hooked up, and quite frankly a little loopy from the pure oxygen they had her breathing. Mom out now, and seems to doing better, they gave her a clean bill of health for the most part, told her to go the PCP (who by the way she had just seen on Thursday and said she was fine and yet the ER said she was lucky she didn't have a heart attack), which is why they kept her. They said her heart unstable and oxygen very low ( duh, that is why she came in, she couldn't breathe). She will be changing here PCP. But she seems to be doing better and insisting that I take some of her medicine when I'm there, since I've been sick myself. I laughed and told her with everything going on, I didn't have the time to be sick, so it'll just have to go bother someone else. But mom always wins. What she wants me to do, I do, even if I think she needs it more and I don't want to take away from her. But she goes so far to basically put it my mouth so what am I supposed to do?
I hope everyone has a great day today single or coupled. Just go out and enjoy the sunshine while we got it and I hear it won't be so cold. The wind was a *itch yesterday. It was worse than just being cold. Weekend though and part of next week looks like it will be nice (yes, I watched the weather this morning). What ever anyone does, I hope they stay safe and watch out for those who celebrate too much and then drive. Have a great weekend!
Friday, February 7, 2014
Being Old
Once again, went out to take grandma to her doctor's appointment, then run her out to her house to get mail so she can keep paying her bills. I HATE taking her to her house. I would much rather go alone. She can be in a good mood the whole day, we get to her house and that's it, no more happy. We go inside, she collects her mail, which her son dutifully puts on her dining room table, he knows better than to throw away ANYTHING, including junk mail. EVERY time we go there she complains, no not complains, has a conniption fit about her house. Some of the things she says is just ridiculous. Because she isn't the one doing the cleaning, it's filthy, falling apart and might as well get rid of all her stuff. Her home is clean. It might be dusty, but it's clean. Things aren't exactly as she left them, she has to use a walker on wheels to get around and make sure she doesn't fall (which she does all the time due to her Meniere's disease, which causes dizziness and instability) The first time I went out there without her, while she was still in the hospital I moved some of her furniture around because it DID NOT make sense they way it was set up. She had the coffee table in the middle of the living room so she could walk between the coffee table and the couch to get to the bathroom or anywhere else on that side of the house. She doesn't sit on the couch, she sits in a recliner, so logically, the table should be closer to the couch leaving the living room more open so she can move around easier. So I moved the table closer to the couch and opened up the area so she could move smoothly through her house.
Oh, this was so not the right move on my part, and the bad thing is she just assumed her son did it. I told her I did it. She stopped complaining, but wanted it moved back. FINE. Every time we go out there she has nothing good to say about her house, her son or even her sister. I HATE being put in the position of having to defend my uncle, because I am definitely not his number one fan. But I had no choice. But of course as she says "your just taking his side". I DO NOT WANT to take his side. Sometimes though, something has to be said. And how insulting is it to complain to the very people who are caring for your home while you are away that it's filthy??
I finally had it out with her Monday night. Whether any of it got through to her or not I don't know. But I do know I'm not taking her to her house anymore unless she stays in the car. Before everyone jumps on me for telling off my 90 yr old grandma, let me says I did not yell or scream. I used logic, her faith, and a good dose of guilt. She is more concerned with material things than she is with her own well being. My mom heard everything I said, didn't interfere and finally went to bed. This lasted until 11:30 at night. Way past everyone's bed times and I was/am sick on top of all that.
You might wonder what finally made me break my silence. Some things happened a long time ago that she claims not to remember. I didn't bring it up to make her feel bad, but I brought it up so maybe she would understand that I know what she's feeling when she feel like she's lost her home. This started a whole "I've treated you so badly" and I don't even remember it conversation. Tried over and over again to explain to her that it wasn't brought up as a "look at what you did to me" but I was just trying to get her to understand that I understood how she felt. Anyway, the last straw was when I came in and overheard my grandma tell my mother she wasn't going to be making any more doctor's appointments because she had already caused enough problems in my life. She did not know I had walked back in the house. I wanted to say something right away, but held my tongue. After I knew I wouldn't holler at her and would thing logically and clearly that is when I confronted her. There was a lot said but it boiled down to this: "You have two choices in your life that you can control. Either choose to be a positive person and enjoy the years you have left, or keep being negative and be miserable". Everything else is up to God. From previous blogs some of you know the situation already. But she can control how she sees things, she can be positive about life and maybe achieve happiness before she leaves this earth, or she can choose negativity and leave this world earlier that she probably would have if she would have chosen optimism. Positive emotions will keep you going much longer than negative ones. Her health is okay, she should be happy, but she's not. She's too busy feeling sorry for herself because she can't go home to live by herself. Thanks grandma, glad being by yourself and surrounded by your precious material things are more important than your health and the ones who are trying to care for you. She doesn't understand how she hurts or insults us when she complains about not being able to be home. I've spent more time with her in the last 4 months than I have in almost 20 years. I'm happy to able to do what I can for her. Why can't she be happy and just enjoy her last few years on earth? If I ever hear the word "burden" come out of her mouth again, I just may treat it like a foul word and wash her mouth out with soap, like she did us as kids when we said bad words. I love her, more than I can say, but this constant poor me crap has got to stop. Please God, do not let me wind up like that. This is another reason I do not want to live to be an old person.
Oh, this was so not the right move on my part, and the bad thing is she just assumed her son did it. I told her I did it. She stopped complaining, but wanted it moved back. FINE. Every time we go out there she has nothing good to say about her house, her son or even her sister. I HATE being put in the position of having to defend my uncle, because I am definitely not his number one fan. But I had no choice. But of course as she says "your just taking his side". I DO NOT WANT to take his side. Sometimes though, something has to be said. And how insulting is it to complain to the very people who are caring for your home while you are away that it's filthy??
I finally had it out with her Monday night. Whether any of it got through to her or not I don't know. But I do know I'm not taking her to her house anymore unless she stays in the car. Before everyone jumps on me for telling off my 90 yr old grandma, let me says I did not yell or scream. I used logic, her faith, and a good dose of guilt. She is more concerned with material things than she is with her own well being. My mom heard everything I said, didn't interfere and finally went to bed. This lasted until 11:30 at night. Way past everyone's bed times and I was/am sick on top of all that.
You might wonder what finally made me break my silence. Some things happened a long time ago that she claims not to remember. I didn't bring it up to make her feel bad, but I brought it up so maybe she would understand that I know what she's feeling when she feel like she's lost her home. This started a whole "I've treated you so badly" and I don't even remember it conversation. Tried over and over again to explain to her that it wasn't brought up as a "look at what you did to me" but I was just trying to get her to understand that I understood how she felt. Anyway, the last straw was when I came in and overheard my grandma tell my mother she wasn't going to be making any more doctor's appointments because she had already caused enough problems in my life. She did not know I had walked back in the house. I wanted to say something right away, but held my tongue. After I knew I wouldn't holler at her and would thing logically and clearly that is when I confronted her. There was a lot said but it boiled down to this: "You have two choices in your life that you can control. Either choose to be a positive person and enjoy the years you have left, or keep being negative and be miserable". Everything else is up to God. From previous blogs some of you know the situation already. But she can control how she sees things, she can be positive about life and maybe achieve happiness before she leaves this earth, or she can choose negativity and leave this world earlier that she probably would have if she would have chosen optimism. Positive emotions will keep you going much longer than negative ones. Her health is okay, she should be happy, but she's not. She's too busy feeling sorry for herself because she can't go home to live by herself. Thanks grandma, glad being by yourself and surrounded by your precious material things are more important than your health and the ones who are trying to care for you. She doesn't understand how she hurts or insults us when she complains about not being able to be home. I've spent more time with her in the last 4 months than I have in almost 20 years. I'm happy to able to do what I can for her. Why can't she be happy and just enjoy her last few years on earth? If I ever hear the word "burden" come out of her mouth again, I just may treat it like a foul word and wash her mouth out with soap, like she did us as kids when we said bad words. I love her, more than I can say, but this constant poor me crap has got to stop. Please God, do not let me wind up like that. This is another reason I do not want to live to be an old person.
Friday, January 31, 2014
Negative People
I've learned something new this week, which is truly astonishing, not because of the information, just because the nature of it. Negative people are ALWAYS going to remain negative. Those who do nothing but complain about others, have a tendency to always focus themselves. My grandmother, (whom I love dearly, so please don't think anything I say is meant as not caring). If I did not care it wouldn't bother me. I have been running her around to her various dr. appts. errands she wants to run and anything else I can help her with. She was diagnosed last year with lymphoma. She did 8 treatments of an immunological drug since she refused to go through Chemo, some how managed not to see her oncologist the entire duration of her treatments, which didn't make any sense to me, since they need to keep an eye on her progress and if the treatment is working. She is staying at my mother's ( God Bless Her) and I'm doing all the transporting. I have the use of her car so that I can be there when she needs me, and its a fair trade off that I use it to go to school. I'm getting off point here. So, Monday we go see her oncologist for the results from all her various scans. And GOOD NEWS!, NO TUMOR CAN BE SEEN. It has disappeared and her lymph nodes are back to normal. She was happy, but not overjoyed and bursting with happiness. She was more concerned with getting out of there. She has to go ever two months for a couple of years for maintenance, to keep it from returning. So her port cannot come out. And all she has done since this whole thing started was complain that she could get her hair permed because she was taking CHEMO. She told this to everyone she spoke to. So because her hair dresser thinks she is on chemo that she cannot give her a perm. When we asked the oncologist about the perm, she told us " she could have had a perm this whole time, she isn't on chemo drugs, she is on immunological drugs. Very different type of therapy and has no effect on the hair. For months anyone and everyone has heard her complain about how she hates her straight hair can't wait to get a perm. She hasn't had straight hair in over 35 years and it just looks awful. Her words not mine. I think she looks great with her straight hair. But because she was telling everyone she was taking chemo, she screwed herself. I don't know if she truly thought she was on chemo or just confused about what she was taking, or wanted people to feel sorry for her. Everyone complimented her hair, but damn if she could actually just say "thank you" instead of launching into how she is taking chemo and she hates how her hair looks blah, blah, blah. I think you get the idea. We lost a set of her car keys when we went to her house to pick some things up over a month ago. I found them that same Monday. She was happy for about 2 seconds and than she started complaining about her house is dirty and might as well just burn the thing down and smash everything she has. She said something similar when we were having her car worked on. Very melodramatic and negative. Apparently she has always been this way, but I didn't notice when I was a kid, or as she has gotten worse as she's gotten older. But her sisters are all the same way. They can't say a good thing about anyone, unless your in the room. Once you leave, the knives come out. Sad thing is they can't even get along for more than five mins before they start on each other. Please save me from turning into her. I don't want to be a person like that. The woman is 90 years old and should be happy she is still here, while so many others have died. She is still mobile, she isn't confined to a bed, she doesn't even look her age. She is always complimented when we go somewhere and still can't just say "thank you". The moral is, if you are negative early in life you are going to be worse when you get older. There are so many things I could tell about her, but that would be a long, long, "blog". Stopping now, otherwise I never will....
Friday, January 24, 2014
Applying for a job over the internet
Does anyone remember when you wanted to apply for a job, you had to go in, sometimes with a resume sometimes not, either way you still filled out an application and you got to speak with someone? What happened to being able to make a first impression by applying in person? Now everything is internet applications. I have filled over 100 internet applications out looking for a job. Not one single call from a prospective employer, but I sure as heck got calls from every school in the country wanting to continue my education. Little exaggeration here, but I think you get the idea. Even when you check off that YOU DO NOT WANT TO CONTACTED BY A SCHOOL OR OTHER LEARNING INSTITUTION you are still contacted. When you are trying to get a job the last thing you need is your phone ringing all the time with call from recruiters for schools, instead of prospective employers.
Now as for applying for jobs online, here is a trick some people don't know: every application is vetted through a computer, if certain key words are not in you resume or application, consideration for the job is not even a possibility. The application and resume never make it to the employer who is hiring. This is frustrating and annoying. Getting a job is about your ability to perform the job, and being able to communicate with others, including a possible employer. What happened to first impressions? Even if a new Pizza Hut or McDonald's is hiring, you still have to fill out application online. I worked for McDonald's as my first job and when I applied recently online, my resume and application never made it to the proper people because I did not have the CORRECT KEY WORDS. I could run that place with my eyes closed! Online applications are convenient because you don't have to drive anywhere to apply, BUT you also don't get a chance to actually talk to the hiring manager, store manager or anyone else. First impressions when meeting a prospective employer are important, especially for kids who are in school and need a part time job or those who are out of school and need a full time job.
It's time to take the computers out of the equation when applying for a job. Fill out an application online and send your resume, but it's time to take the computer gatekeeper out of the equation and let real people actually read the resumes and talk to the applicants. Anyone can put in the correct key words in an application if they know about it, (which most don't) and know nothing about the actual job, just did a little research. You hire this person because they matched all the key words, but when they actually start working you realize they are clueless. Even worse, they are not easy to work with or just in general have a nasty attitude. This works for them because they can keep getting jobs, even if they are fired. As long as they research and use the correct key words, the computer will keep sending the application on. This is not fair to the general public. We need to go back to applying for jobs in person, or at the least have REAL people look at them, not some stupid computer looking for key words. I won't even start on some of the "personality" tests some of these employers make you take after you fill out all your information on the application, attached your resume and then said ok, now just one more thing. Some of the questions are just obvious, some are just stupid, and others don't make sense. I will mention that the time it takes to fill out the application and answer the personality tests can be over an hour long! You can tell I have issues with this, anyone else see the same thing or is it just me?
Now as for applying for jobs online, here is a trick some people don't know: every application is vetted through a computer, if certain key words are not in you resume or application, consideration for the job is not even a possibility. The application and resume never make it to the employer who is hiring. This is frustrating and annoying. Getting a job is about your ability to perform the job, and being able to communicate with others, including a possible employer. What happened to first impressions? Even if a new Pizza Hut or McDonald's is hiring, you still have to fill out application online. I worked for McDonald's as my first job and when I applied recently online, my resume and application never made it to the proper people because I did not have the CORRECT KEY WORDS. I could run that place with my eyes closed! Online applications are convenient because you don't have to drive anywhere to apply, BUT you also don't get a chance to actually talk to the hiring manager, store manager or anyone else. First impressions when meeting a prospective employer are important, especially for kids who are in school and need a part time job or those who are out of school and need a full time job.
It's time to take the computers out of the equation when applying for a job. Fill out an application online and send your resume, but it's time to take the computer gatekeeper out of the equation and let real people actually read the resumes and talk to the applicants. Anyone can put in the correct key words in an application if they know about it, (which most don't) and know nothing about the actual job, just did a little research. You hire this person because they matched all the key words, but when they actually start working you realize they are clueless. Even worse, they are not easy to work with or just in general have a nasty attitude. This works for them because they can keep getting jobs, even if they are fired. As long as they research and use the correct key words, the computer will keep sending the application on. This is not fair to the general public. We need to go back to applying for jobs in person, or at the least have REAL people look at them, not some stupid computer looking for key words. I won't even start on some of the "personality" tests some of these employers make you take after you fill out all your information on the application, attached your resume and then said ok, now just one more thing. Some of the questions are just obvious, some are just stupid, and others don't make sense. I will mention that the time it takes to fill out the application and answer the personality tests can be over an hour long! You can tell I have issues with this, anyone else see the same thing or is it just me?
Friday, January 17, 2014
Unemployment Rate
Is anyone else tired of hearing how the unemployment rate in Florida is low enough that the long term unemployed don't need any more assistance?? Did anyone in Tallahassee ever wonder what would happen to those who still can't find a job and they now have no income because Florida's unemployment rate is only 7 percent?? I would really like for someone to explain how they come up with those numbers. Do they poll every person in Florida? I think I can safely say NO. I know I haven't received any phone call asking if I found a job yet. Does the Governor think that just because they say the unemployment rate is down, that it has to be true? Once you stop receiving benefits, there is no way for the government to account for the actual unemployed. So only 7 percent of the state is receiving benefits. What about the ones who are no longer getting benefits because they have exhausted their tiers, which used to go up to 5, then 4, then 3, and now none. How about those people who have to live with family because they can't get a job, have no income and would otherwise be on the street if not for help from relatives or close friends? How are they counted? Or the ones who are on the street because they didn't have family or friends who could help them? They are not counted. Our Governor likes to says how low the unemployment is so he can inflate other numbers and use the money that Florida would have received for unemployment benefits in other areas that HE DEEMS WORTHY of the money. But I don't think this is a problem with just Florida, I think it is everywhere. Okay, maybe the Governor is just Florida, but as for how we account for who is actually employed and unemployed there is no real system to determine how many people are actually unemployed. Those who get lucky and find a job, they are usually low paying ones, and have to get two jobs just to earn enough money to keep their heads above water. This also leads to more unemployment because that second job that person has to get, could have gone to someone with no job. I think if everyone was actually counted, the unemployment rate would be closer to 15 or 20 percent! I could go on all day about this topic, especially since it hits so close to home but I'll leave it at this. Stay tuned for my next blog about trying to get a job through internet applications. That one is gonna be fun! Stay Safe
Opinions are something that everyone has, some have the same, some don't. Why can no one seem to respect other's opinions without being judgmental or having to argue with them and tell them they are wrong? Opinions are not right nor wrong, they are how a person thinks or feels on a subject.
If you don't like the opinion, fine. State your case, but don't be argumentative or judgy. Let it go. If the opinions expressed are always different from yours, then maybe you shouldn't be talking to that person, unless you like to argue and aggravate everyone around you. You know who you are. People seem to have a need to believe that everyone should think just like them. Never going to happen. We are too diverse to think alike and if we all did think alike, we'd be so freaking bored with each other we die out just from boredom. Being like everyone else just makes you a sheep. Don't let others tell you how to think. Think for your self and be your own leader.
If you don't like the opinion, fine. State your case, but don't be argumentative or judgy. Let it go. If the opinions expressed are always different from yours, then maybe you shouldn't be talking to that person, unless you like to argue and aggravate everyone around you. You know who you are. People seem to have a need to believe that everyone should think just like them. Never going to happen. We are too diverse to think alike and if we all did think alike, we'd be so freaking bored with each other we die out just from boredom. Being like everyone else just makes you a sheep. Don't let others tell you how to think. Think for your self and be your own leader.
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